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Warning: Adult Language Ahead

September 29, 2009

My husband is a rat bastard.  I get to say this for two reasons:

1)  What he did deserves it.

2)  I gave him fair warning that I was going public with this.  He laughed.


Now on to the story……

Yesterday evening, Brandon was doing something in the kitchen and asked me to put his wallet in his lunchbox.  So, being the wonderful, kind wife I am, I obliged.

This is what greeted me.

snake 019

I am most definitely NOT a fan of snakes – they scare the living bejesus out of me.  Hubby seems to think it’s pretty funny to stick the occasional snake in his lunchbox and then ask unsuspecting me to get into the lunchbox for some reason or another.  This is now the second time he’s pulled this little stunt.  I told you he deserved the “rat bastard” name.  

I did get a little chuckle out of the ordeal though….  Brandon had just finished saying how this was one of the most gentle bull snakes he’d caught in a while (he catches them on a regular basis and brings them home to help with the field mice population that surrounds our house), and the snake started to vibrate his tail to imitate a rattle snake and started hissing.  Then it happened, the “gentle” snake striked at Brandon several times.  It didn’t hurt B, but I did have to point out that Karma was getting him back.

snake 012

As retaliation, B’s off hunting next week, so I will be doing some major redecorating.  Be afraid hubby, be very afraid.

5 Comments leave one →
  1. Trena permalink
    October 1, 2009 10:53 pm

    Definitely a rat bastard! You should buy something really, really expensive while he’s off hunting.

  2. Lizzy permalink
    October 11, 2009 3:19 am

    I would shit my pants. No exaggeration.

    You have fun with your re-decorating. You deserve it!! 🙂

  3. Margie permalink
    October 12, 2009 10:44 pm

    Mention Lorena Bobbitt to him, see if that name rings a bell.

  4. October 20, 2009 4:33 pm

    Oh my Brandin, I will come up there and give you the biggest smack on your head. I too have no love of any snake. Do NOT care how tame they seem to be. Not for me! You go girl, let him have both barrels!.
    Aunt Julie signing out

  5. October 29, 2009 2:01 am

    Here’s the problem, this is a one-sided blog. Obviously Brandon has no chance to defend himself or to give his side of the story since you hold the power of the pen. So I’m going to say (and having known you since grade school I can say this with above average certainty) that you deserved it. Either way I wet my pants reading the story and picturing your reaction. One more reason why Brandon is my hero…

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